How do I feel? What do I need?
Updated: Aug 26, 2020
A lot of my coaching clients share with me that self-regulation (both physical and emotional) wasn't something that they were really taught growing up. It wasn't always modeled or encouraged for them to check-in with themselves and ask "How do I feel? What do I need?". I hosted a 5-day "Stress Less Reset" and many of the participants shared that it felt like they were re-getting to know themselves all over again. I held space for them to practice listening to their bodies and their emotions, feeling for what they needed, and taking Inspired Actions to get themselves rebalanced. Little by little. Moment by moment.
One simple tool that they used was simply checking in with themselves a few times a day and asking themselves- "How do I feel? What do I need?". It sounds so simple, but the truth is this basic technique can serve as a building block on a path to more self-awareness, more self-acceptance and compassion, and better self-regulation (i.e., giving ourselves what we need to get back to balance-ish:).
Luckily this day and age, this is something that is now weaved into most public schools in their Social-Emotional Learning (SEL) curriculum (yay!). It's also something that a lot of parents practicing Positive, Mindful, Respectful, Collaborative (etc.) Parenting try to actively foster in their kiddos. So that from a young age kiddos can hold onto their innate ability to acknowledge what they are feeling, accept it, and find ways to get or give themselves what they need to be in equilibrium.
I wanted to share with you one tool that is helpful to teach and practice this with our kids, and one opportunity to help you learn and practice this for your self (as well as let go of a ton of stress).
So for the kiddos: One of my favorite tools for teaching kids to identify their emotions, checking in with themselves, as well as giving themselves what they need to be/stay regulated is Generation Mindful's Calming Corner or Time-in Toolkit (you can find it HERE). My spirited 5-year old has been using this set up for years and we just bought another one for her pandemic parent co-op kinder pod. It's a fun and simple way to teach kids the "How do I feel? What do I need?" process.
For you! For those of you that might be feeling stressed to the max with all that is going on in the world, I invite you to join us in community for 8-weeks with Stress Relief through Mindful Living as we relearn how to listen deeply to ourselves, sharpen our ability to identify what it is we need, and practice giving ourselves what we need to stay in balance-ish (I say ish because we are all busy parents, so progress, not perfection is the name of our game;). The good thing about it is I have taken the best research from mindfulness, positive psychology, cognitive-behavioral therapy, and a touch of strategic planning... and created boiled down, research-based tools and techniques for the busiest of parents. Think falling asleep to a guided Therapeutic Meditation and waking up feeling more rested, relaxed and with a reset nervous system.
So that you can get the benefits (less stress, regulated nervous system, self-awareness, increased self-acceptance, more energy, etc.) with less of the time and effort.
If you want to know more about what we are about, join us in our free Mindful Parenthood Community Facebook group or check out more information about the upcoming program HERE.
The program starts in just 2 weeks!
Space is limited to 20 participants and we are halfway full!
This is my last group program of year!
If you are are interested, but want to learn more you can join us for an hour-long Information Session on Wednesday, 9/02 at 12 noon PDT (replay will be available for those that register).
We'd love to have you along for the journey!
Mindful Life Coach for Parents